I drink and internet constantly. These guys just suck at it.
“I’m pretty good with electronics when I’m drunk,” Deadspin’s Greg Howard says, “But my best friend went to Brazil with me a few years ago. It was our whole soccer team. We got fucked up the last night—we were all browned out essentially—and he said he had to take a shit. He just up and disappeared. We went looking for him the next day, and the whole team found him passed out on the toilet with his laptop out. He’d shat in the toilet, and he had a porn site up with four RedTube videos loaded—for seamless switching I guess—passed out with his dick in his hand. It was pretty sickening, really.”And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why drunk internet is bad internet. Be safe out there.