After finally finding time between his chronic masturbation and chronic laziness, Yutram decides to tackle a mod by a German group called 580 Studios. And by “tackle a mod,” we mean “stall for time,” because the mod in question is marked released minus an installer.
Reviews
The Engine Room Episode 2?
Due to technical difficulties that were technically unforeseen, I’m technically stuck trying to fix the next episode before I release it. Technically, it was supposed to be released yesterday.
I guess what I’m technically trying to say is:
TECHNICALLY DELAYED!
I figured you technically deserved to know that the next episode is on it’s way, and should technically be live any day now.
Stay tuned for Episode 2: Electric Boogaloo!
You Can’t Do That On XBox! Season Finale
The final episode to be done in garrysmod. We’re ending this in a “Lets Play” style with Portal 2 maps.
It’s been fun! See you in SFM!
You Can’t Do That On XBox! Death Sentence for L4D2
Tomala and… Tomala? Escape from jail in the TARDIS and go back to their current office in the present to do a review together of a campaign called Death Sentence.
You Can’t Do That On XBox! Space Trip (L4D1)
This campaign is terrible… in a good way.
realMyst for iPad
So, Kaelis here with a review of Cyan Worlds’ latest iOS release: “realMyst for iPad”. You can grab it from the Apple App Store here. I’d recommend reading this review first, however.
My first experience with Myst was playing a friend’s copy of realMyst for pc, so realMyst has a certain nostalgia value, and well, to be honest, Cyan’s iOS port of this beloved game disappoints.
On loading it up, I was feeling rather positive, the opening was good, the new loading screens really added a nice feeling of how disorienting linking must be, I really, really like them. Its not a flyby, but having been in Uru for quite a while, it works,and it’s a huge improvement on those screens.
Ok, all looks cool, the water looks pretty decent, I thought as I wandered along the dock, I turned and walked into the imager room… And what’s this? A small loading bar as I wandered into the room. It yanked me right out of the world of Myst, and right back into my hotel room in Sydney. I thought to myself, surely they could’ve managed to at least have parity with the engine they had so many years ago – at least, I’d hoped, their new realMyst could page in content at least as well as plasma 1 did for the original realMyst
It was then that I wandered up to check out the library, and the observatory… More loading bars. I went ok… Let’s have a look at the books in the library… Well, yeah. The book pages were incredibly low-resolution, and grainy. They are actualy barely readable.
I went back over Myst Island and noticed more and more low-resolution textures, bad seams on the animated textured objects used as ripples in the water around the mast of the ship.
I haven’t mentioned this yet, but in general, the whole game is rather laggy, on a iPad3, and the control scheme is slow, clunky, and counterintuitive… You touch to move, any movement in that touch is interpreted as a swipe, and will turn you instead and you also touch to interact. I would’ve much preferred dual thumb/joystick style spots on the screen, and then touch objects to interact.
At this point, I realised that the “Epic Citadel” tech demo, that supports the first generation iPad had better performance (even on the aforementioned 1st gen iPad), looked significantly better, sounded better, and controlled better. The epic citadel demo had roughly the same amount to render, as Myst Island, if not more, infact.
As much as realMyst had a great deal of nostalgia value for me, that was about when I closed it in disgust. What exactly had Cyan been spending their time on? I know that the engine they used supports day-night cycles… Yet they removed the lovely ones from realMyst. I later tried to reopen it, only to be met with a massively long loading screen, it was about that point that I decided that this was no longer worth my time.
All in all a massive disappointment, I’d really recommend people steer clear of this one.
You Can’t Do That On XBox! Chaos Theory (L4D1)
Tomala reviews Chaos Theory while behind bars. A campaign native to the L4D1 universe. Full of plenty of wtf moments. More than you could shake a stick at!
You Can’t Do That On XBox! Death Aboard (L4D1)
Back to the plot… Tomala is in jail having to do reviews. She lucks out though by having to review Death Aboard for L4D1.
http://www.guildofslackers.com/snews/
You Can’t Do That On XBox! Gore Factory (L4D1)
Tomala reflects upon a map for L4D1 that was too small to be made into an actual review… wait.
You Can’t Do That On XBox! Left 4 Cake for Left 4 Dead 1
For every good map or campaign there is likely to be a bad one that can drive one over the edge. Tomala reviews the final valve themed campaign known as Left 4 Cake, which will change Tomala forever… until she sees something even worse that could change her again.