I think someone escaped from a mental institution today, and it wasn’t me this time! I guess I had this coming since I’ve been having nice work days since the start of the new year. Anyways on with the shtory!
There was this old lady in the store today wearing a black TShirt with a fake tuxedo on it, black skirt and black pippy long stockings. Her hair was colored like a faded rainbow (you could see the gray through it), and she was complaining to me that the US gov could find her in Europe but not in the US, and because of this she couldn’t get any job. Then she told me her life story about how she was in Europe ready to become a University Professor (you have no idea how hard it was for me to keep a straight face, but luckily I watched enough Stephen Colbert to know how to keep a good poker face) and that Homeland Security ruined it for her. Thankfully I had a phone call save me from her blather, however… I would soon discover she had victimized a few other co-workers. She told one that she was a witch banned from the US for two years, and when she returned she was added to the “no fly list”, and to another she said she talked to the company founder back in the 90’s (which is funny considering he died in the 80’s) and he said we all needed to all stop being white trash Oregonians. Which is funny considering the only real white trash people are people who migrated here from the south with some exceptions of a few locals.
I’m glad it’s all over now at least. I can spend three days in my own little world where my friends are a slenderman with a mullet, a dalek from New Jersey, a blockdude, a spy, and an eyeball with a tophat. Oh god… I think I’m crazy too. O_o