Ruining It For Everyone Else Since 2004
Boys and their toys

Boys and their toys

Well, if any of you thought the Yaoi on my blog over the years was bad, just wait until you read what I saw syndicated over at MystBlogs. I’m sure at some point it’ll get removed from both there and thednijazzclub, but since I’m not syndicated over there it’s time to have a little fun…

sober-toothed kumah: It’s a whole, full number, just like 1 and 2.
twaboop: Martha Stewart
sober-toothed kumah: but it’s bigger than 3.
twaboop: are we guessing the length of your penis.
theclam: yes
twaboop: yours?!
theclam: kumah’s penis is (ninja) inches long
twaboop: you’re a clam.
pheenxexual: clam’s have long tongues
theclam: no, my penis is [REDACTED]
pheenxexual: or wait, that’s oysters, hurr
twaboop: I thnk kumah’s penis is (puke) inches long (bow)
pheenxexual: sounds like you’ve thought about it quite a bit
twaboop: I’ve revised it.
sober-toothed kumah: no no no. My penis is about 6 and a half inches long.
twaboop: oh.
twaboop: why do you always say it’s short.
sober-toothed kumah: I don’t.
sober-toothed kumah: And actually, I showed a chick my penis last night. Your mother doesn’t count.
sober-toothed kumah: She said it was “Impressive” Anything will look big to a 3 year old.
biddly boppity bert: how nice
sober-toothed kumah: I’m guessing her boyfriend has a short penis. Duh… 3 year old boys have small penises
twaboop: “quaint” Yes, that’s how you describe something that’s very small…
theclam: “unobtrusive” Yes, small penises do not get in the way.
twaboop: “reasonable” Good for him, unreasonable penises usually end up in prison.
sober-toothed kumah: “The masterbaterImproved.
theclam: “well-compressed” Yes, small penises usually are.
twaboop: “would accent my decor rather well” If you decorate your house with dicks… Dr Wongburger is that you???
mandyputer: wtf is with all the launchers breaking
theclam: “pasteurized” IOW, sterile.
twaboop: “organic” I would hope so…
theclam: “made in berkeley” With all of his obsessing, I would have guessed San Francisco.
twaboop: “asymmetrical” You’ve seen it?
theclam: “proletariat” It’s a low class penis…. I knew it all along.
sober-toothed kumah: my penis is organic, until I use the strap-on fix’d
pheenxexual: Man, text looks really, really weird in Firefox 4
twaboop: “automorphic” At least once a day.
theclam: “anti-aliased” So he imported it into his games?
pheenxexual: Not bad, but I think it’s got subpixel rendering now
pheenxexual: Yeah, basically
twaboop: “well-rendered” Again… at least once a day.
pheenxexual: FARMS? IN BERKELEY?
theclam: “auto-updating” Yes, he downloads regularly.
twaboop: “cleanses the palate” Brushes the dogs teeth with it.
pheenxexual: That gif has so many good things going for it
sober-toothed kumah: “Shit cock” After he’s done with the dog…
theclam: “sandboxed” Needs all the traction he can get!
twaboop: “fab” I think you mean fap. This is Kumah after all…
theclam: “knock-knee” It scares him…
twaboop: “As big as the bee’s knees” Fixed.
pheenxexual: “shindig” Does a private party count as a shindig?
theclam: “epiphenomenal” There is a real one, and the one in his mind. Guess which is bigger…
pheenxexual: “hootenanny” Just can’t stop partying with that thing can’t he…
sober-toothed kumah: “Diabetic” Amputee candidate.
pheenxexual: “oodelally oodelally” Take that out of your mouth before you talk. Jeez…
twaboop: “the square root of two” it’s irrational!
theclam: “Ladies and gentlement, tonight we introduce, the prick of the hour, the wang of a thousand faces, it’s Kumah’s penis!” No, it’s the wang he WANTS in a thousand faces, and at MystBlogs he did it!
pheenxexual: applause
theclam: “applaudable”
pheenxexual: there’s a laudanum for that
twaboop: “certainly memorable” It’s hard to forget something that small.
theclam: “being repressed” Translation: Can’t get it up. Next…
twaboop: “unimaginative” Can’t spell his name in the snow…
kneeputer: http://i.imgur.com/B71Dv.jpg
theclam: “the tallest tree in the forest. with a herring” After the forest has been clear cut.
twaboop: “ethical” If it was ethical you’d think he’d keep it in his pants.
theclam: “dehydrated” Happens when you masturbate too much. Durr.
twaboop: “good with white wine” Not much bigger than a swizzle stick.

I may have too much time on my hands, but at least that’s all I have in them.